The Blog of Columbus, Georgia

Nearly nine years of often-humorous views on life in Columbus, Georgia -- the government, the people, the flow of the river, whatever. Coverage, community, comedy - concluded.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

-> Our other blog starts with poker, then goes in directions you might not expect. See what we mean at "On the Flop!" <-

You've probably heard the phrase, "All good things must come to an end." Today I apply that phrase to this blog -- although I realize some of you never have been really sure about how good this blog is.

After more than 11 total years of online humor writing, close to nine years of blogging and 2,727 posts, The Blog of Columbus officially ends today. For some people, I'm sure this will be disappointing -- but they should look on the bright side. Now Robert Schweiger and C.A. "Brother Love" Hardmon can branch out and set up blogs of their own.

Since LaughLine began for national subscribers in January 2000, I've dreamed of making a living doing comedy writing. But LaughLine died for lack of interest in 2002 -- and while this blog has about 1,000 visits a week, it simply hasn't brought in enough income to pay the bills. In fact, this year's blog income doesn't even cover one month of frozen rent.

(Before conspiracy theories start: only a few people paid me over the years to write this blog, in terms of donations or advertising. And absolutely no one is paying me to stop this blog. If someone had thought of that along the way. well. )

What started in 2003 as a blog with humorous thoughts about Columbus grew into much more. I've marveled at what it's become, with a mix of satisfaction and frustration. It's humbling to have the mayor return your phone calls, get breaking news directly from public officials -- and even be offered tickets to a circus, real or political.

But the frustration admittedly has come from people who wanted to turn a humor blogger into something else. I never really wanted to become a puppet for people who want to reform towns. I also never planned to get on the "speed dial" of people who openly admitted to a history of mental illness. By sharing their "opinions," I sometimes wondered if they wanted to spread their conditions as well.

Long-time readers know I wrote this blog for several years while working part-time at a Columbus TV station. That station let me go in 2009, and I've been searching for new steady employment ever since. That opportunity finally has come, outside my chosen career of journalism. So now I'll hand out "scoops" to others, instead of spilling them myself.

(For now, I plan to continue my other blog. "On the Flop" was spun off, to be a mix of poker and ministry. But before you start rumors, I am NOT turning pro and moving to Biloxi.)

The thought occurred that I could continue to write this blog, perhaps on a reduced scale. But I don't think that would be fair to this new job opportunity, so I decided to give it my full time and attention. Besides, most doctors recommend getting more than five hours of sleep per night.

I step away believing this sort of "alternative journalism" project in Columbus will go on. I played a small role last year in developing Robbie Watson's River City Report, which appears ready to carry on some of the things I've done here. Sometimes I think she could use emoticons to make her jokes more obvious, but that's her choice.

The end of this blog probably will mean no more heady stuff, such as interviews with city managers and local celebrities. But it also will mean the end of late-night blog writing, which sometimes stretched until 2:30 a.m. First the brain cells start to die, then comes heaviness in the eye.

Whether you're reading this blog for the first time today or have been a loyal nine-year follower (Blogger counts 16 of them), I deeply thank you for your interest. It has been humbling. Thank you for your input, which occasionally has been stinging. And I leave you with words I wanted to leave for co-workers at two other jobs, but could not because of circumstances -- words made famous by Georgia's own Alan Jackson:

Way down yonder on the Chattahoochee

I learned a lot about living, and a little about love.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

(BLOGGER'S NOTE: You may find the following items humorous, serious, or a little of both - but we offer these thoughts from time to time, as we keep a seventh-day Sabbath.)

Did he do it? I really don't know. Even after hearing and reading plenty of arguments pro and con, I don't know. When it comes to high-profile cases like the one which caused all the controversy in Georgia this week, I'm not a Chief Justice. More often than not, my title should be Waffle King.

Since my background is in journalism, I watched the Troy Davis story from a distance -- even though a few people wanted to drag me into the fight. And I'm thankful no physical fighting broke out at the state penitentiary when it was over Wednesday night. One wrong move at the wrong moment, and "Selma 1965" could have found a brother named "Jackson 2011."

There was plenty of emotion over the last few days of Troy Davis's life. Now there's time to sort things out, and see what is backed up by fact and what isn't. It's a little bit like what Georgia football fans went through, after the Boise State game.

Let's start with a quick review of what happened, and what could have happened but didn't:

+ A reprieve from Governor Nathan Deal couldn't happen. GPB reported Georgia's Governor is one of only five in the U.S. who by law cannot make one of those movie-script last-second phone calls to save lives. He can only change living people's careers by executive order, as a state climatologist discovered.

+ President Obama could have intervened, but he didn't. In fact, he's only pardoned 17 people since taking office. That's five more than George W. Bush's pace -- but shouldn't a supposed "bleeding-heart liberal" have liberated hundreds by now?

+ Some Twitter users found special irony in the fact that the final appeal rejection notice came from Clarence Thomas. He's Georgia's contribution to the U.S. Supreme Court, and grew up in the Savannah area where Troy Davis was arrested. But for Thomas's critics, skin color should have run thicker than a map book.

+ Other online comments compared Troy Davis to Casey Anthony, and called it a classic case of racial injustice. They somehow missed the news about Lawrence Brewer -- a white supremacist executed in Texas the same night for the dragging death of James Byrd. Brewer's execution came even faster, and seemingly without NAACP complaints.

+ Mark McPhail's mother amazed me, with all the live TV interviews she did on the night of the execution. Annaliese MacPhail was on CNN with Anderson Cooper. She was on WXTX not once, but twice. For someone "waiting by the phone," she stood outside on her front lawn in Columbus an awful lot.

+ Perhaps less amazing was the report that someone drove by Annaliese MacPhail's home Wednesday night and yelled, "Save Troy Davis." As if she was going to recant, after rejecting the recantations of seven other people.

+ WTVM/WXTX again showed why in terms of coverage it is the "News Leader" of Columbus. (Yes, even after I was fired from there.) WRBL wasn't live anywhere at 11:00 p.m., not even at the mother's house. Who knows how many Kurt Schmitz fans broke their promise never to watch his old station again?

With all that said, I'm posting this on a Saturday for several reasons. Several deep issues and images came up in the Troy Davis case, which cry out for more discussion.

1. SEVEN OVER TWO? Davis's backers constantly declared seven of the nine prosecution witnesses at his trial recanted their testimony. Maybe so -- but what about the other two? Where have they been in recent months? Why didn't Mark MacPhail's supporters bring out a recounting, to counter recanting?

My Bible tells me the "testimony of two or three witnesses" is enough to convict someone of a crime -- even a capital crime such as murder. If District Attorney Julia Slater and her staff can't find those witnesses, that's another matter.

2. THAT'S AN ORDER, FRIEND. There was no doubt which side Columbus Fraternal Order of Police President Randy Robertson would take in this case. But there were times when the "tough cop" side of him came out. For instance, Robertson demanded all his Georgia Facebook friends post a picture of Mark MacPhail -- or "I WILL DEFRIEND YOU." Quite a change from the "Officer Friendly" I saw in grade school assemblies.

Part of me wants to say Randy Robertson's demand made him look more like a bully than a friend. After all, does a true friend require someone to change their behavior or actions? Well, this is why you should be careful about considering your workplace boss your friend.

Yet Jesus did put a stipulation on friendship with Him. It's in John 15: "You are my friends if you do what I command." That's proven to be a tough requirement for a lot of people. Ask any Tea Party member about "rendering to Caesar that which is Caesar's."

Proverbs 27 advises against forsaking friends. But Proverbs 22 warns against making "friends with a hot-tempered man." Unless, perhaps, you're paying him to be a bodyguard during weekend nights on Broadway.

3. TAKE ME, I'M YOURS. The most powerful picture I saw all week regarding the Troy Davis case came from downtown Atlanta. A pastor chained himself to a flagpole outside a Georgia state building, offering to give his life in exchange for Davis, The District Attorney's office might want to write down Marvin Morgan's name, for future death penalty cases.

Pastor Marvin Morgan promised to stage a protest fast while chained to a pole for as long as he can. You might dismiss it as a publicity stunt, but he was symbolizing (at least) what Jesus did for all of us. The end of Romans 6 says we're all under a "death sentence," because of our sins. Some people simply get more attention for it than others.

But Romans 5 points out Jesus Christ paid the death penalty for us long ago. It was a penalty He didn't have to pay, because He never sinned at all. I think that's a really good deal, which more people should accept. It certainly beats that offer on radio of "a 40-dollar tan for a 20-dollar bill."

4. THE END OF IT ALL? Many media reports called Wednesday night's execution "the end" of the long drama. If you think it is, think again. Troy Davis's last words asked people to keep investigating his case. And Georgia civil rights groups have spent decades doing that very thing, attempting to clear people's names. I doubt Columbus Police would merge its "cold case" unit with theirs, but you never know.

By extension, I don't think what happened Wednesday night is the absolute end for Troy Davis -- just as it was not the end for Mark MacPhail in 1989. Hebrews 9 reminds me humans die, "and after that to face judgment." And from what I can tell, the Georgia Supreme Court will not be reassembled for that one.

Revelation 20 tells of a time when almost all people will stand for judgment before Christ. But it indicates that won't happen for at least 1,000 years. Wow -- Harold Camping's revised date of 21 October apparently is going to be wrong again.

The good news is that by taking advantage of Jesus's offer to pay the death penalty for us, you can be brought back to life when He returns -- 1,000 years before everybody else. I told you that was a really good deal. Even if II Peter 3 notes 1,000 years are like only one day to God.

When that real judgment day comes, a God who sees everything will reveal exactly what happened on that fateful night in 1989. Both victim and suspect are likely to be there, along with all of their closest friends and relatives. And hopefully they'll know better than to talk back to Jesus -- because I suspect He can respond even tougher than Judge Judy.

COMING SUNDAY: A big announcement some blog readers have waited a long time to see.

Our count of unique visitors from January to August was up 22 percent from 2010! To advertise to them, make a PayPal donation, offer a story tip or comment about this blog, write me - but be warned: I may post your e-mail and offer a reply.

BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: 569 (- 59, 9.4%)

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

Friday, September 23, 2011

Today is the first day of autumn in Columbus. During my college years, I drove home from campus one fall Saturday morning to relax with the family. But I wound up on top of the house, because the rest of the family decided it was time to put new shingles on the roof. For a while, political science textbooks seemed a bit more appealing.

After a hot and dry summer which left almost the entire Columbus area with an extreme drought, water seems to be making a comeback with the change of seasons. A surprise rainstorm developed in my neighborhood Thursday night, as I began to write this edition. Yes, I know it was cloudy almost all day - but who really expected the clouds to give up long after dark?

This week's rainfall may wind up costing Columbus more than we realized. Deputy City Manager David Arrington told WRBL Thursday Comer Auditorium might be declared a loss beyond repair, due to a partial roof cave-in and water damage. The gym floor has standing water - and it came too early in the season for basketball towel crews to train for the clean-up.

David Arrington says the city of Columbus has property damage insurance for Comer Auditorium, with a $50,000 deductible. So far, no one has answered the obvious question - whether the secret fund for the Columbus Blazers basketball team could have paid for that.

Comer Auditorium has been a landmark in Bibb City for decades - and perhaps the only fully-intact landmark left, after the River Mill fire of 2008. What will that neighborhood do, if the gym has to be torn down? With all the water on the floor, is it too late to postpone Monday's groundbreaking for the MidTown natatorium and move the location?

Only a few blocks from Comer Auditorium, rainfall probably was a welcome sight Thursday - at the Chattahoochee River. After all, we don't want to require whitewater rafters to bring their own gallon jugs to fill the course.

A "River Blast" event above the Columbus Riverwalk officially kicked off the "Ready 2 Raft" construction work downtown. We posted a picture of heavy equipment in the river Monday. This gathering allowed local leaders to show they can put on helmets and hard hats, too. Only when they absolutely have to do it, but they can.

Whitewater developer John Turner says something had to be done on the Chattahoochee downtown, because the river dams are more than 100 years old and probably would collapse before long. So why not show a little patience, and wait for that to happen. Several church groups would love to do a reenactment of the Red Sea crossing.

Phenix City Mayor Sonny Coulter joined Columbus Mayor Teresa Pike Tomlinson at the River Blast event. You may recall Coulter expressed concern months ago about his city being left out of the whitewater project's planning stages. He's apparently now satisfied a new place to raft won't give him the shaft.

(Since the entire Chattahoochee River downtown is considered part of Columbus, Sonny Coulter should be thankful he was invited to be part of the ceremony at all. But Phenix City skeptics say Coulter has a secret weapon at his disposal - a city sewage treatment plant which sometimes spills, and could make this a brown-water course.)

I'm not sure if any of the local leaders went for a sneak-preview boat ride on the river, but the evening news showed a group of people carrying a raft over their heads on the Columbus Riverwalk. You'd think Columbus State fine arts majors would have had classes to attend.

Exact details of the whitewater project still are not final, but promoters say it will end with a new restaurant overlooking the Chattahoochee. Why spend all that money for membership in the River Club, when you can visit a Captain D's where the fish seems fresher than ever?

With hope the right parts of Columbus dry out soon, let's quickly check other items from the last full day of summer.

+ Phenix City attorney Dana Gentry was arrested at his office. If I understand the legal language properly, he's charged with possessing a bad check as well as "criminal simulation." If criminal simulation is against the law, then how did Crimestoppers get away with all those reenactments on the evening news years ago?

+ Duke men's basketball coach Mike Krzyzewski lectured Fort Benning soldiers about teamwork. Please do not be confused about this. Simply because he's known as "Coach K" does NOT mean he's to blame for high gas prices at Circle K.

+ WBOJ-FM "88.5 the Truth" announcer Garrett Lee told WXTX he went through three separate for "The X Factor" in Dallas. But an e-mail finally informed him he was NOT chosen for the TV show. From the clips I've seen on Fox, Lee might have made it to Hollywood if he had worn a wig and acted like Lady Gaga.

+ The Springer Opera House opened its new theatrical season with "The Blues Brothers Revue." I drove past the entrance before showtime and spotted a man near the door with sunglasses, a dark fedora hat - and a noticeable gray beard. Aw, c'mon! That's jazz, not the blues.

+ Troup County trampled Columbus in high school football 44-0. The game at Kinnett Stadium was delayed for awhile due to lightning - undoubtedly sparked by Troup returning the opening kickoff for a touchdown.

BURKARD BULK MAIL INDEX: 628 (+ 17, 2.8%)

The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author -- not necessarily those of anyone else in Columbus living or dead, and perhaps not even you.

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